


Bimbo effect 2

by annonfan224



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:01:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28214403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annonfan224/pseuds/annonfan224
Summary: Based on the work of the artist Annon "find him on Twitter" a sexualized retelling of the mass effect 2 story including bimbo transformation.
Relationships: Shepard/harem
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	1. Bimbo Effect 2: CH 1 Prologue

Bimbo Effect 2: CH 1 Prologue 

In an unidentified space station around a dying star two people were having a meeting. One was a woman with long black hair wearing a skin tight white and black junk suit. The other was an older gentleman in a nice suit, cybernetic eyes, and smoking a cigar.

“The Shepards did everything right. More than we could have asked saving the citadel, even the counsel. Humanity has the complete trust of the galaxy” the woman says

The man takes a puff of his cigar “but it’s still not enough”

The woman walks towards the man “they have them hunting Geth. Geth!”

“We both know that the reapers are the real threat.” the man says

The counsel will never Trust Cerberus no matter what humanity has accomplished. But shepard they are heroes icons.” the womans says

“They are the key to beating the reapers, and understanding their powers, both mental and physical” the man says

“They have the most experience, fighting Sovereign and making contact with Intimacy. They are our best hope. But they are only two people, We can’t afford to lose them.” the woman says

“Then let's make sure we don’t lose them” the mans says

###

The SSV Normandy SR-1 was flying through the Termanice system. Having been assigned to hunt down the remaining pockets of Sovereign's geth. The crew was bored of the wild goose chase hunting down leads that often didn't bear fruit.

Then out of nowhere an unknown ship drops out of light speed. It’s easily ten times the size of the Normandy, a mixture of earth and machine. It's almost like someone made a spaceship out of an asteroid. It was also oddly phallic shaped.

It opens fires before the Normandy can react. The ship has greater maneuverability and weapons that the Normandy had ever seen. It cuts through their shields tearing the Normandy apart; the initial attack killed Navigator Pressly and several crew mates.

Alarms were blaring and sirens wailing. Fires were everywhere But Liara T’soni the sexy Asari crew member ran through the Flames. Until she finds who she was looking for. “Shepard!”

The shepard twins were attractive bombshells. But they had just put on their pressurized suits so you could just see Jane Shepard’s curves and John Shepards muscles through their armor “the distress beacon is ready to launch” John says cal under pressure

“Will the alliance get her in time?” Liara asks as she and the twins grab some fire extinguishers to fight the flames 

“They Better” Jane says in her usually hot headed manner

“Don’t worry they won’t abandon us” John says

“Get everyone to the escape shuttles” Jane orders

“Jockers still in the cockpit” Liara says

“Go i'll get him” John says

“I’m coming to” Jane says

“No need for both of us sis” John tries to reason

Jane thumps her brother on his chest “no man left behind” 

She starts moving. John turns to Liara, unable to be romantic in such a dire setting and with helmets on he gives her a quick one armed hug and in as tender of a voice as he could manage “get everyone to safety. That s a order Liara”

Liara was too choked up to speak but nods her head. She got out the escape pod with what remained of the crew and launched them to safety.

The twins meanwhile ran through the flames until they got to a pressurised bariour. It went from the roar of the inferno to the deathly silence of space. They walked to the cockpit as fast as possible only the sound of their breathing could be heard as teh saw the unknown enemy attacking their beloved ship.

They finally get to the cockpit where their beloved pilot Joker was doing her best to keep the ship together “joker let's move!” John order

“No i can still save the Normandy” Joker pleads

“The normandy is loss, going down with the ship won't change that” Jane says

Joker grunts in frustration “fine help me up” the twins help pick Jocker up when the attackers fire again “watch the arm!” Joker pleads as the Twins forcefully drag him to the last escape pod.

The ship falling apart around them they manage to get Joker into his pod just as the attackers give one last shot of concentrated energy making a deathly lazer wall between the twins and Joker. Joker barely has time to shout their names as the pd launches and the twins are sucked into the cold space.

They feel the air being leaked out of their suits as they watch the Normandy be obliterated. They try to reach for their oxygen tanks but there's nothing they can do. The siblings knew there was no way to escape their fate hug each other as they drift towards their deaths

“This isn’t the end my lovers” a kind metallic voices whispers

###

Bimbo Effect 2

###

The twins knew only darkness and cold. But through it they heard a female Voice “the twins have been recovered the lazarus project can commence” for what seemed like both an eternity and seconds they felt their flesh warm and sensation return.

In one instance one of the twins regains a bit of consciousness. And sees a bald man a and a attractive woman talking “oh my god they're awake” the man say

“No their not ready yet” the woman say “hit them with a sedative

“Brain activity going off the charts” the man warns

“ hit them again” the woman orders, the twin begin to lose focus as the woman looks over him with eyes filled with curiosity and lust.

###

Jane slowly regained consciousness. Her muscles felt sore but strong. She felt her bed shake and heard explosions in the background. A woman’s voice started to rouse her “Commander wake up. Shepard, you need to get out of that bed the facility is under attack.”

Jane gets up clutching her side “shepard your scars aren't healed but i need you to get moving.”

As she gets up she sees her brother. “John? You're alive! Wait, I'm alive what the heck?”

John looks around “whats going on?”

The woman’s voice speaks on the intercom again. “No time to explain. You're alive and if we want to keep it this way i need one of you to grab the pistol from the locker.”

The twins get up and quickly stretch the aches and groans out of their limbs. John reaches the locker first. He tosses Jane her armor and takes the gun.

“Hey why do you get the- woah what happened to your face bro?” Jane notices cracks along John’s face that had light leaking out of them.

John feels his face “must be part of whatever they did here. Yuck you have them to.”

Jane quickly feels her face feeling the cracks, they go down her neck and under her clothes. She was going to have to take a serious look next time she had a bathroom and a mirror. But the explosions happening all around took top priority.

“This gun doesn't have a clip” John says

“It’s a med bay” the woman voice said sarcastically “well get you a clip- d*** it, those canisters are about to explode, take cover.” The twins follow the advice as the doors blow open “someone hacked security to try to kill you, find a thermal cli and well try to meet up.”

It doesn't take long for John to find a clip and load the gun. They turn the corner and find their first enemy. A LOKI-mech, a basic security robot with white armor helmet like head and a screen for a face with two red vertical circles for eyes. It garbled in a synthetic voice about finding the target, then raises it’s pistol to aim.

John raises his own pistol but nothing happens “darn thing’s jammed. 

Jane growls and stares at the mech. She didn’t just come back from the dead to be taken out by an overgrown gameboy due to a mechanical failure. She feels a strange tingling sensation surround her body. Her body glows blue and pink as her breasts levitate a little. In a rush she swarms to the mech and crushes it against the wall with her breasts crushing it like a soda can.

John stares at his sister in shock “Jane did you just use Biotics?”

Jane stares at the robot with the huge melon dents in it “i think i just did… OW! Kaiden complained about headaches but that really hurt. “She then flushes red and grabs her armor’s codpiece. “And Liara never said how horny it would make you”

“Target acquired” another LOKI mech charges Jane. but this one had a pink hint to it’s armor, it’s “eyes” were heart shaped and it notably had breasts. Though not as big as a geth’s. Jane is about to be blindsided by it when John headshots it. He then walks up to his sister. Looks at the fallen mech. Then coursly he waves his hand, a wave of energy moves it a few inches. “What did they do to us?”

Jane was forcing her body to regain control “i don’t know but you can bet Intimacy is involved somehow. Why else would someone put boobs on a robot?

“Shepards you have to move, but be careful more security Mechs are closing in on your position” the woman says

The twins want answers but they know they have to keep moving. Jane grabs the fallen mech’s pistol and the two move on. They turn into more mechs and take them out. A handful have the heart eyes and seem more interested in getting close than aiming at the twins. As they move they see the corpse of the station’s crew and mechs. They didn’t know what was going on but they hated seeing so many dead for no reason. They get more ammo from the fallen mechs and corpses and even a grenade launcher which made Jane very happy to blow up mechs with “jane i’m not sure but i think your scars are glowing red”

They move through the station being led by the woman’s voice. As they explore they find a journal about something called project lazarus a small hologram of an attractive woman with black hair pops up “progress on the subject is slow. But the major organs are functional and rudimentary neural processing. In an effort to speed up the process we moved from organic reconstructions to biosynthetic fusion. Early signs show promise. It's odd when we try to focus on saving one subject they both begin to fail. It’s like they are connected in something more than genetics.”

They find another journal entry by a man this time “the cost of this project is astronomical. Over four billion credits so far. But nobody seems to care if we've gone over budget. I don’t know where the boss gets all his money and maybe it’s better not to know. I just wish he would send a littlemore my way once in a while. At least I have a great view in my work.”

“Was that gyr leaching at my corpse!” Jane say angrily

“Would you rather he leach at mine?” John asks

Jane makes a weird face and waves her hand in a 50/50 motion.

They keep moving on trying to get out of the collapsing starion when they meet their first survivor. A black man wearing a black uniform. Short military haircut. And a nice thin goatee and mustache. As soon as he saw the two of them he forgot he was in a firefight “what the-? Shepard, I thought you two were a work in progress.?”

“You tell us,” Jane says, diving for cover with him.

“Are you with that woman?” John says

“Right I forgot this is all new for you two.” the man says “I’m Jacob taylor i’ve been stationed her since- D**** it” he keeps shooting at the mechs “things must be worse than i thought if Miranda is having you run around. I’ll fill you in but we should get you to the shuttle first”

Jane takes a few shots and turns to Jacob “look i know this isn't the best time but were tired of stumbling around without what going on”

“Fair Enough” Jacob says “I'll give you the quick version. Your ship was attacked and destroyed. You two were as dead as dead could be when you got here. Our scientist spent the last two years bringing you back. You've been comatose for most of that time. Welcome back to your life”

“That- something to take in”John says

“What about our crew?” Jane says letting it sink in

“Yeah that's a lot to take in. The alliance had you officially declared dead. As for the crew, help me take out the mechs and I'll tell you everything you want to know.” Jacob says.

The twins nod and the tree of them finish off the mechs with pistols and their new biotics.once they had a free moment Jacob started to answer their questions “ok i agreed to give you answers. Your crew, there were some casualties XO Pressly and a few lower deck crew. But most got away thanks to you. But as far as i know most were either reassigned or had to move on. You were gone after all”

“At least they're safe. We can find them later” Jane says relieved

“I still don’t understand how are we not dead?” John asks

“You were dead, but project lazarus was made to bring you two back. Cutting edge technology” Jacob responded

“Two years… What do you mean cutting edge? Cloning? Cybernetics? And how many test subjects were there?” Jane says

“I’m just a guard so you would have to ask the scientist. If they're still alive. But as far as I know you're not a clone. They wanted to bring you as close as possible. Your still you just with a few extra pieces” Jacob says

“These do feel a bit fake” Jane says lifting her breasts up making Jacob blush

“That would explain the biotics” John says

“Right” Jabo says “the whole point was just to bring you two back. But that weird energy really messed with the project. That pink stuff almost had a mind of it’s own fixing things we didn’t even know needed fixing. Some guys started messing with it a few experiments I didn't think much off till a loki bot tried to hump me after my workout”

“Yeah it does that” Jane says “”you think it has anything to do with the attack?”

“No, I was getting ready to get some shut eye when the alarms started blaring. The mechs that found me tried to hump me instead of shoot so that gave me the chance to escape. But for the whole station to go off like this. Had to be an inside job.” Jacob says

“A woman was leading us on the coms. Who is she?” John asks

“That's Miranda Lawson she’s in charge. She spent the last two years putting you two together so i figure she wouldn’t want to lose you two now. Do you know what happened to her?” Jacob explains

“It didn't sound good. Gun fire and shouting” Jane says

“She can take care of herself. We need to get out of here” Jacob says

“What's the quickest say out?” John says

Before Jacob can answer a new voice comes on coms “check check is anyone their? I need help!”

“Wilson that you?” Jacob answers “i’m with Commander shepard and we just took out a squad of mechs”

“Shepards alive? How the-? Never mind get out of there and meet me at network control.” Wilson says

“I think I remember Wilson checking in on me?” Shepard says

“That's him chief medical tech. Answers directly to miranda. We need to get to him” Jaco says

They start moving and finding more journals. One from wilson saying that they were almost done and that he deserved respect. And another of Miranda saying that the reconstruction was almost complete but they had to bring back the same minds, same morals, and same personality. And that any alterations would be a faliler. But that there were added perks with the radiation experiments.

They found Wilson but that man seemed very paranoid. Trying to get them out of there. After fighting more mechs Jacob takes them aside “Shepard things are tense if I tell you who we work for will you trust us?”

“Not the time Jacob” Wilson says

“We won't get far if they think we're going to backstab them” Jacob says “Project Lazarus, it's controlled by cerberus.”

“Cerberus!” Jane growls starting to lift her gun

John stops her “Jane lost her squad to Cerberus, but you helped bring us back JAcob. Well make up our mind about your bosses later”

“That sfair. Once were out of here will take you to the illusive man” Jacob agrees

“That your boss?” Shepard asks

“It’s not his real name, no one knows that. But he runs Cerberus” Wilson explains

“I’ll never forgive Cerberus. But i judge people on their actions not who their affiliated with” Jane says “now let's get out of here”

John turns to Jacob as they move out “we'll figure this out after we save your butts”

The fight through more mechs finding one last journal entry form Miranda “subject has been recovered. But it's worse than we thought. Outwardly they look fine but celery they suffered from extreme degradation from age, and being exposed to subzero temperatures as well as vacuum. Despite that Wilson asurse me they are salvageable. And I believe they are still radiating the energy they got from the reapers. This could prove illuminating.”

They finally make it to the evac zone but when willson opens the door Miranda is standing there “what? no your supposed to be-” wilson is cut off as Miranda shoots him

“Dead?” the woman looks differently than when Jane first saw her. She was taller, her face softer with eyeshadow and black lipstick. Her black hair was silky smooth and long. Her outfit was a white one piece suit with a hexagon pattern. A zipper that was zipped down to that her braless breasts almost popping out, they were slightly smaller than shepherds but more well rounded. Her neck had a black choker and a necklace that says bimbo on it. The back was completely missing leaving her soft @$$ to the world. Her arms were covered in long sleeved gloves that only revealed her fingers and sharp whited nails. She had a black belt and black metallic high heeled boots. She was attractive before but Jane could only identify her as a bimbo now.

Jacob ran up to her “what the heck Miranda why did you do that?”

“Willson betrayed us all; he was paid to kill Shepard, sabotaged the mechs and killed the staff. Were all that left.” Miranda says

“Are you sure?” Jacob asks

“I’m always sure. I’ve spent too much time and effort on these two to let him sabotage us now.

The twins lower their guns “we don't agree but will let it go. But why did cerberus bring us back?”

“Ah jacob i should have know your counses would get the better of you” Miranda says

“Lying to them won’t help them join our cause” Jacob says

“Fine the illusive man has a plan for you he’ll fill you in once you meet them.” miranda says

“we better get some answers once we're out of here. We’ve had enough of this station to last a lifetime” Shepard says

“Or two in your case” Miranda says with dry humor.

###

They fly away heading to another Cerberus facility Miranda and Jacob talk to the twins checking about their memories and personality. Jane's slaver attack on Mindor and John’s growing up in the military. Their respective heros and survivor status. How they saved both Ashley and Kaiden on Virmire. And choosing Captain Anderson to be the human representative on the citadel counsel.

“Glad to see you two have your memories in tact” Jacob says

“Yeah but your going to have to be real convincing with threat to get me to trust Cerberus” Jane says

“We didn’t say anything about a threat” Miranda says

“Why else would you bring us back?”John says “i’m more interested in why you’ve been messing with Intimacy;s radiation”

“Yeah miranda, i didn't want to say anything but you’ve gotten a lot…. Bigger since this started” Jacob says

Miranda scoff “my change came as a result of personally working on you two for the last two years. But you’ll find your friend's intimacy has been busy the last two years. I’m relatively tame compared to the changes that happened on a lot of worlds.”

“You're going to have to explain that.” shapard says

“Don't worry commander, the illusive man will fill you in. we didn’t spend all that time bringing you back for nothing.” Miranda smiles

###

End Chapter


	2. Bimbo Effect 2: Ch 2 Freedom’s Progress

Bimbo Effect 2: Ch 2 Freedom’s Progress

The twins looked around the sanitised station sceptikly. The busty woman miranda was working at a terminal and just nodded them to a door “the illusive man is waiting for you”

Hey enter a room with a circular platform. Once they stand on it a grid like projection surrounds them and makes a hologram of a far away room with a man sitting in a chair a cigarette in one hand and a drink in the other “Commander shepherds i presume”

“Illusive man” John says crossing his arms “i thought we be meeting face to face” Jane finishes unhappy

“A necessary precaution for those that know what we know” the illusive and says

“And what is that?” shepard smartly replies back

“That humanity is up against the greatest threat of our brief existence” Illusive man says

“The Reapers” shepard says

“Good to see your memory is still intact. How are you feeling?” the illusive man say putting his cigarette in a ashtray

“You have to earn the right to ask us that” Jane says

“Cerberus isn’t evil Ms. Shepard we want the same thing we just have different methods” the illusive man says unfazed

John steps in trying to be diplomatic. “We don't know if we can trust one another but you must have brought us back for a reason. What are the reapers doing that made you bring us back?”

The illusive man stands up and walks up to the holgaram of the twins “we are at war, hundreds of human colonies have disappeared. No one wants to admit it, but humanity is under attack. We believe it is happening by agents of the reapers like how Saren and the Geth attacked. 

The alliance can’t help because they are still rebuilding from Sovereign's attack, they want to believe the reaper threat died with him. The attacks on colonies are too random for the alliance to commit to anything so they just blame it on pirates and slavers, it's more convenient for them that way. But hundreds of thousands of humans had been taken. Were being harvested.”

“Sovereign wanted to harvest all life in the galaxy, why just focus on humans?” John asks

“Maybe you got their attention when you killed one of them.” The illusive man says “I don't know if they know fear but you have got to respect the fact you beat one and got another on your side. This made you unique not just in skill and experience, but by making you a symbol, that's something the galaxy can respect”

“What happened to Intimacy couldn't she confirm if this is a reaper attack or not?” John says

“No one has heard of your reaper friend since you disappeared. But she must be active. Her radiation has been popping up everywhere. Some claim it for their own as beauty augmentations. Others think it’s ancient prothean artifacts reactivating. You wouldn’t believe the new conspiracy theories popping up about protheans since the radiation was found. Bottom line the galaxy is a sexier place then it was two years ago, but no one wants to acknowledge the source. Especially since it spreads like a virus.” the Illusive man reports

Jane growls abit “if your right we might consider helping, for the alliance not for you”

“I’d be disappointed if you believed me without seeing for yourself. Miranda and Jacob will take you to Freedom’s Progress, the latest colonie to be abducted.” the illusive man says sitting down

“What will we find their” shepard says

“If I knew that I wouldn't send you. Find any evidence you can: what happened to the colonies? Who took them? Do they have any connection with the reapers? I brought you back it's up to you two to do the rest” with that the illusive man hangs up.

They leave the room and walk up to Miranda “the Illusive man is very impressed with you.that will be a assist for this mission.”

“I just wanted to say thanks for what you did back at Lazarus station. We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you” John says

“ I hope it was worth it we lost a lot of people on that station” Miranda says

“Just trying to get to know you if were going to work together” Jane says

“I have the utmost respect for your skills shepard, but I'm not sure about your motivations. I believe in Cerberus and our cause. Only time will tell if you’ll jeopardize that or not”

“Very well, what can you tell us about this colenly?” sheard asks

“Freedom’s Progress? Absolutely unremarkable until they disappeared. Well just find a lot of empty building s and one big mystery” Miranda says

“We’d like to know more about the Lazarus project from the one in charge” shepard says

“I wasn't in charge, the illusive man was. If i was i would have done things differently” miranda says

“Like what?” Jane asks

“First of all i would have put a control chip in your head . but the illusive man wouldn’t allow it afraid it would alter your personality. He didn;t want anything that would make you not you” Miranda says without a hint of hesitancy

“In that case i’m glad you weren't in charge” Jane says

The illusive man is taking a huge gamble with you i just hope it pays off” Miranda says

“Well at least you got that hot bod out of it” Jane says

“All it did was enhance my seduction skills” Miranda then shuts down any other attempt of communications till the twins get the hint she doesn't want to talk.

“What a ice queen “Jane tells John “might be too much even for you bro” They talk to Jacob and find he was a good man that was ex-alliance military. But was tired of bureaucracy stopping him from helping people and joined Cerberus. The twins weren't sure about Cerberus but they knew they could trust Jacob

###

They board a shuttle and head towards the conly as the twins are briefed.the hope was to get their before any looters or official investigation teams got there so they could piece together  
what happened. There was no evidence of any struggle in the previous attacks; people were just gone. But the twins wanted to help any survivors if there were any. Miranda thought this unlikely but Jacob held a little hope that it wouldn’t be a ghost town.

They landed in the night. Light snow fell shining in the electric lights still shining. But it was completely quiet. The squad moved out trying to find clues but it was like everyone just disappeared. Dinners still out, tools left at attention. It was an eerie abandoned city.

After a few minutes they find loki mechs that start firing at them, most were normal but their were a few that looked like sex bots with guns” after the fire fight Jacob speaks up “they sound’nt have attaked they should have seen us as humans”

“Someone must have reprogrammed them” miranda says “that means were not alone

“Is anyone going to explain why some of them look like sex dolls?” Jane complains

Mirannda glares at Jane”officially the company was promoting a new design to be aesthetically pleasing to certain customers”

“But who would believe that” Jacob says “we found traces of radiation similar to you two on them.”

“Speaking of Jacob aren't you afraid of being affected by our radiation, we never really found a way to turn it off” John says

“I know the risks and accepted them. Plus it's not all bad might make my workouts a bit easier” Jacob says. Jane does a little fist pump behind Jacob’s back

They fight their way past a few more mechs and reach a locked room. When they open it they find a squad of Quarrians. Once noticed they raise their weapons “stop right there” one orders

Then a familiar quarian forces his gun down “Rasa you said you would let me handle this… wait Shepard?” It was Tali, their friend from the Saren mission. Her suit was still skin tight r but she looked older and more mature. Her large rear was to be envy her boots more like heels than combat boots. And her breast has gone up a cup. It was a shock to see her but she was their and it was a relief for the twins to see a familiar face finally, even if it was being a pinkish visor.

“I’m not taking any chances with Cerberus operatives” the one called Rasa says

“Put your weapons down I'll handle this” Tali orders then tenderly turns to the twins “Jane? John? you're alive?”

“Talie remember that Geth Data we gave you did it help complete your pilgrimage” John says

“Yes it did Shepard” Tali says

“Remember the time we stemmed up the engine room?” Jane starts

“Yep definitely you shepard” Tali turns to her squad “Rasa stand down this is definitely Commander shepard”

“Why are your old commanders with cerberus?” Rasa asks

“I don’t know lets ask him” Tali says annoyed

After trading information they found out a quarian named Veetor was there when the colony was attacked. But a nervous nature and a damage suit made him a danger to himself and others. He locked himself in a warehouse and reprogrammed the mechs. The other Quarians didn’t trust Cerberus and Miranda didn’t trust them. But they agree to work together and split up to find Veetor.

But The Quarians disobey Tali and rush ahead. The squad get their in time to see the quarians get destroyed by a heavy Yimnir Mech..”it has heavy armor and shields they never stood a chance” Jacob says

“This is gonna be a tough fight” Miranda says

But between good teamwork and using their new biotics the squad manages to destroy it. They find Tali treating the survivors of her team “go find Veeter”

“I’m sorry about your team” Jane says as they move out

“I thought you would do one of your crass jokes” Miranda says

“Like how that large mech wasn’t turned sexy so it couldn’t **** you?” Jane says sarcastically to which Miranda huffed

“They don’t like each other” Jacob says

“Two top B***** no duh” John says as Jacob nods

They find Veetor in front of a large security control terminal. He's muttering to himself in a panic delusion about monsters. They try to comfort him but he is lost in his own world so they have to turn off the computer to get his attention.

After calming him down a bit he shows them security footage he manually pieced together. In the video they find swarms of large bugs flying around and a strange crustacean like alien taking paralizd colonist away”is that? I think that's a collector!?” Miranda says

“Is that some kind of alien?” Shepard asks

“They live beyond the omega 4 relay. Few have ever seen one alive; they usually work through mercenaries or pirates. But if they came out in person they have the advance technology needed to disable a colony” Jacob Explains

Veetor nervously explains that insect like machines paralized the colonists and took them away.. He wasn't sure how he survived so he just hid. But he managed to gather a lot of data on his omni tool. Miranda wanted to take him to the illusive man but Tali came in and said he needed to be returned to the flootila. The twins agreed with Tali to take Veetor back home for medical care but took a copy of his data.

As they wait for pickup the twins talk to Tali “you could join us you know. Be just like old times”

“I want to shepherd but I'm on an important mission. I can’t abandon it. I can't tell you everything but it involves the geth. That should let you know how important it is. Once it’s over and I'm still ilive we’ll see.”

“Take care Tali” the twins say as they give her a peck on the cheek each. She blushes through her visor and takes Veetor away. The twins then look at the security footage at this new enemy they had to face.

###

The twins return to base and debrief the illusive man. He congratulates them on finding out the collectors were the culprits. The twins could tell he wasn;t telling them everything but they couldn’t get him to talk. All they find out is that the collectors pe to find genetic anomalies in species then retreat beyond the omega 4 relay that only their ships can go through.

They were still unsure but they knew the importance of the mission “if were going to this we will need a army or a t least very good team” John says

“I’ve already compiled a list and dossies on potential crew members to help you on your mission. Finding them and convincing them to help will be your responsibility, but your a natural leader it should be no problem” The Illusive man says

“Keep your list we want our old team” Jane says

“That was two years ago most have moved on or changed allegiances” the illusive man says

“Liara T'soni?” 

“She is working on Illium, rumor has it for the shadow broker if that's the case she can't be trusted”

“Tali already helped us”

“That was unexpected i need for intel before i commet”

“Wrex?” 

“he returned to Tuchanka has been of world for a year, trying to unit the Krogan clans”

“Ashley and Kaiden?” 

“still part of the alliance i believe they were given promotions. Their records are surprisingly well classified”

“Garrus?”

“The Turian disappears a few month after you did, even we couldn’t find him”

“Ok we get it their unavailable” Jane complains

“What about the counsel, were still specters” John asks

“If you think you can get help by all means talk to them. Your a leader though you’ll find who you need” the illusive man says “just remember you’ve been gone a long time things have changed”

“We’ll make sure our team is ready you just worry about the collectors” shepard says

“Good two things before you go. First go to omega and find Mordin Soles. He's a brilliant Salarian scientist who we believe can counteract the Collectors seeker swarms.” the illusive man says

“Ok what else” the twins say

“I found a pilot I think you might like” the illusive man hangs up.

A voice speaks from behind the twins “hey commander, just like old times” it was their scruffy pilot Joker

###

End chapter


	3. Bimbo effect 2: ch 3 Normandy SR-2

Bimbo effect 2: ch 3 Normandy SR-2

The Twins followed Joker through the space station “i can’t believe it’s you Joker”

Joker huffs “look who’s talking i saw you two get spaced”

“We got lucky with a lot of strings attached. How’d you get here?”

“It all fell apart without you commander. Everything you stirred up, the counsel just wanted it gone. Team was broken up, records sealed, and I was grounded. The alliance took away the one thing that really mattered to me, heck yeah i joined cerberus.”

“Do you really trust the illusive man?” the twins ask

“Well i don’t trust anyone that makes more than i do. But they aren't all bad. They saved your life, let me fly, and theirs this they only told me last night” Joker says stopping in front of a window

The lights switch on revealing a beautiful new ship. It was the Normandy but new and improved with cerberus colors.

“It’s good to be home huh commander?” Joker says

“She needs a name” the twins reply

###

The newly named Normandy takes off on it’s maiden mission. Inside the twins are flanked by Jacob and Miranda as the crew greats them

“Welcome to the new Normandy” Jacob says

Miranda starts with business “i recommend we pick up Mordin Solus first we'll need his expertise to combat the Collector’s swarms”

“Yeah we’d be pretty dead without that” John says

A blue orb hologram appears in front of the twins “Acquiring Mordin Solus seems the most logical course of action.”

“Who are you?” Jane says

“I’m the ship's Artificial intelligence. The Crew likes to refer to me as EDI” Edi says

JAne smirks “Joker won’t like someone else flying his ship”

“I do not helm the ship, Mr Monroe's tallents will not go to waste. During combat I man the ships cyber warfare defence and offence. Outside of that I observe and offer advice. Nothing more”

Jane speaks up “AI’s are illegal for good reason”

“But can also be a great ally” John says

“Prove us right” the twins say in union

Edi disappears and the twins turn to Miranda and Jacob. “We assume it takes more than us three and Joker to fly this thing?”

Miranda speaks up “the Normandy has a full crew. You should get to know them. Though given your reputation that shouldn’t be a problem. Jacob and i should return to our post come find us if you have any questions”

Jacob gives a salute and they leave the twins to their own devices. The first one they approach is a red head next to the galaxy map.

“Yeoman Kelly Chambers, I've been assigned to be a personal administrative assistant. Adn might I say it’s an honor to be working with you Shepards.” Kelly introduces herself

“Pleasure to have you ms Chambers” the twins say

“Please call me Kelly”

“Ok Kelly” the twins say with a slight seduction tone making Kelly blush “so what do you do?”

“I moneter your messages and let you know when brew would like to speak to you. Speaking of Joker would like to speak in the cockpit.” Kelly says

“Isn;t that usually VI work?” the twins ask

“Yes but Yeoman is just my official title. Unofficially I watch the crew. I have a degree in psychology. Our mission causes a lot of stress and i’m good at sensing when it’s getting to much so i offer to talk it out and it’s best done informally”

“I would love to get informal with you” John says causing Kelly to grin “your records seem to to correct with your cheesy seduction”

“Wait till you try mine.” Jane says “I bet you’ve read on how our crew changed last mission thanks to Intimacy.”

The new Normandy shouldn’t have any of intimacy’s effects but even if it did i’m sure the changes would reduce the stress of most crew mates” Kelly says with a fake air of professionalism

The twins chuckle but then get serious “Cerberus has a dark reputation. And have screwed us over personally, do you have any reservations working for them?”

“none . our methods may be harsh but they look out for human interests” Kelly says

“What about their no alien policies?”

“They look out for humans but that doesn't mean we all hate aliens. I love humanity, but i also love Asari, Turian, Salarian, Hanar you name it” Kelly says

“Sounds like our kind of girl” the twins say “how do you feel about the mission?”

“I’ve been handpicked by the illusive man to face the greatest threat humanity has ever known. How do I feel? Honored, accelerated, terrified, but most of all encouraged with your command we can’t fail”

“We’ll beat the collectors” John says

“I trust you implicitly. The moment i met ou i knew i could close my eyes fall back and you’d catch me” Kelly says

“I might do more than catch you” John says

“That’s an enticing though” Kelly says with a smile

“We better go nice talking to you” Jane says. As they leave she turns to her brother “if Miranda is any case then Intamacys bimbo radiation is still in us. How do you think Kelly will change?”

John cuckles “you might have competition for hottest redhead on the ship” Jane then punches his arm.

They walk to the cockpit where Joker greats them. He gushes over the normandy and the leather seats. “Cerberus may be an evil organization but they can put together a good ship” Edi then speaks up which instantly kills Jokers mood. He tries to bring it back up by saying there was at least them left from the original crew and it would be better than the old days. Then Jane remiss him that they dieded in the old day

“What a downer” Joker says turning back to the controles

Jane leans in “sorry Joker, where glad to be here with you” she then plants a kiss on his scruffy cheek causing him to blush

They then talk to Edi who gives a run down of her capabilities and notes that many of her functions were locked. Keeping the crew safe by essentially schakeling her. They try to ask her for information about the illusive man and cerberus but she wasn’t able to respond. The best they got was that most of cerberus worked in cells that worked independently, unable to even recognize each other so if one group was caught the rest were not compromised.

They then ask about any information about Intimacy “the rogue Reaper known as Intimacy has not been seen since the attack on the citadel. Although it’s radiation has spread to multiple worlds making it seem commonplace. There are also rumors of sexualized Geth visiting remote worlds but no hard evidence.” Edi reports

“How about on the ship?” Jane asks

“The only form of the radiation comes from you shepard, as well as miniscule amounts from those that have acountured you such as Ms Lawsom and Mr. Monroe” Edi says

“Here that Camander you gave me a bit of muscle but my bones are still glass. Give me some of the good radioactivity” Joker jokes

John rolls his eyes “how about you Edi do we have any effect on you?”

“At this time no. although if you wish i can change my hologram to looke more sexueal” Edid then changes her hologram orb to look like a pink perfectly round boob. 

Joker and the twins simply look at Edi for a few moments till Shepard says “never do that again”

“Seconded” Joker raises his hand

“Very well shepard” Edi returns to normal “logging you out.”

The twins leave exploring the ship meeting crew members hearing their reasons for joining Cerberus and the mission including a family man fighting for his daughter and wife. They also meet the Mess Sergeant Gardner, a funny and crass man who asks to pick up some good ingredient. The Twins agree. Mostly because the good natured ribbing of Gardner’s food by the crew although funny made the twins nervous.

While exploring the armory they meet Jacob. Getting to know him a bit they find that he's a loyal man that likes straight forward talking. “So long as the illusive man walks his talk and you do the same, I'm with you. That’s been the condition for my servos so far.”

“So you don’t really trust there past ether” Jane says

“I doubt you could find a more checkered past. But if the coledter threat is real people will think differently, or we’ll all be tried and executed.” Jacob says

Jane laughs “yeah the collectors are the only reason i’m working with these dogs. Your a good man JAcob, i look forward to working with you” 

As they leave John ribs his sister “you like him....”

“He's a man with his own code. I like that” Jane says “plus if his butt is that cute before we get to him imagine what it will look like after a few missions” Jane is practically drooling at the thought.

They wander their way through finding private quarters much nicer than the previous normandy, then by accident find Miranda's office. Despite being a complete bimbo she worked efficiently and organized. It was almost a turn off on how she simply ignored her sexual nature.”what can i do for you shepard?”

“Is there anything we should know?” the twins ask

“Cerberus isn’t as evil as people believe. If my answers can help settle any fears I'll be happy to answer. So shoot…” Miranda waits for Shepard to speak.

“Is Cerberus military or political?”

“Cerberus has several branches political, military, scientific. The ones you mostly ran into before your… accident were primarily from our military division. But not all cells operate by the same rules. We try not to get bogged down with bureaucracy.” miranda says

“What’s Cerberus ong term goals?” Jane says trying to pick a fight.

“The advancement of the human race. Salarians have their special task groups. Asari have their commandos. Cerberus is humanity's answer to those groups. Miranda says with a matter of fact smile

“But those groups have government overseers, who keeps Cerberus in check?” Jane says

“Nobody, but our investors trust the Illusive man to make the right decisions . He is clear about our goals. Protect humanity and see to it’s advancement.” Miranda says

Jane tries goading miranda about Cerberus resources and how the illusive man can’t be trusted but miranda simply repones calmly making Jane more angry

“Calm down sis. Let me have a go. So tell us about yourself Miranda” John says

“That’s fair, I've spent the last two years learning everything I can about you. I guess to start I've had extensive genetic modifications. Not my choice but I've made the most of it. It’s one of the reasons the Illusive man hand picked me. I’m very good at just about anything I choose to do.” Miranda explains

“Cocky b****” Jane mutters under her breath.

John ignores her and continues “what level of modifications are we talking about?”

“It’s very thorough, genetically I'm superior in many ways. I heal quickly and I'll live twice as long as the average human. My biotics are advanced for a human. Throw in the best training and education money can buy and there you have it.” Miranda says

“Sounds like you were designed to be perfect?” John says

“Sounds that way but i’m not. I still make mistakes, and as intimacy showed I still can have many improvements” Miranda says lifting one of her breasts.

“Your overconfident” Jane says

“It’s facts. My skills, knowledge, strengths, even my looks. They were all to give me an edge. And I use them. And unlike you Jane I'm not a slave to my carnal needs.” Miranda says sitting down again

Jane almost leaps on Miranda but John holds her back “nice talking to you.”

They get to the engines before Jane has calmed down again. Once there they need the engineers a irish man and a brunette woman. “You cam all the way down here to meet us?” the man asks

The woman steps on his foot “your talking to a commanding officer” then salutes

“Ken Donnelly and this is Gabby” Ken says

“Thats Gabriella Daniels” Gabby says

“At ese where just toring the ship” Shepard says

Ken and Gabby were alliance trained. They were part of the fight against Sovereign and knew the threat. But after Shepard's death the council ignored Shepard and Anderson’s warnings against the reapers. Ken was very public about his defence and almost court martialed. But that did get them noticed by the illusive man. They didn’t know much about Cerberus but they were more than willing to fight the collectors and the reapers. They also had some parts they needed to get the ship up to max power and the twins agreed to find them. As they left Ken wolf whistled at Jane’s behind. Gabby slapped him upside the head for that but Jane gave him a wink.

“Another boy toy?” John asks

“Not with his big sister next to him” Jane says chuckling at Gabby;s mannerisms “though a little competition might motivate her to get a move on her own flirting”

The twins head to the last spot on the ship, the med bay. As the door opened they saw someone they didn’t expect to see. “Commander Shepard, I saw the Normandy crumble with you on it. It’s good to see you alive”

“Dr Chakwas it’s good to see a familiar face.” the Shepherds greet their old doctor with a hug. Out of the original crew besides the squad mates Chakwas was the most changed by Intamacy’s radiation. The aged doctor had become a silver haired vixen. Her uniform was a mix of the standard alliance science uniform and the old time doctor whistle lab coat. Her large rear made a perfect cushion for her to sit on. Her silver hair was long and well kept. And her bra-like top was close to bursting with her huge cleavage. Despite all that her Grey eyes were sad.

“Why aren't you with the alliance” John asks

“They assigned me to a hospital in a colony, but life planet side was too static. I spent most of my life on warships.” Chakwas says

“Still i don’t see you working for Cerberus” JAne says

“I don;t work for Cerberus, I work for you” Chakwas snaps “this mission may be crucial to the survival of humanity, I trust you dealing with them will be ethical.”

“Is everything ok Doc?” the twins ask

“I can’t complain that this medbay is nearly identical to the old Normandy. The crew needs my medical expertise. And I'm unofficially an authority on Intamacy’s radiation. The Illusive man thinks he can either avoid or use it, but that’s naive thinking.” Chakwas gives a sigh. “My only regret is that I don’t have my private reserves. I even had a bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy I was saving for a special occasion. I regret not having opened it now.”

“If we find a bottle we’ll get it for you” shepard says

“You don’t have to, besides it’s terribly expensive.” Cahkwas says “in any case it’s great to see you again commander.” she gives a sad little smile.

The twins look at each other and give a nod. Jane exits and guards the door. “What's going on commander?” Chakwas asks

“It's been rough adjusting. So much has changed in the last two years.but having you and Joker on this ship. Makes it feel like the old days again. And you look like you need to pick me up.” john says

Before Chakwas can say anything John goes in for the kiss. At first Cahkwas is surprised but then just allows Shepard to keep going. John kneels a little to get even with chakwas in her chair. They break apart and Chakwas whispers “ it really is you, your back.”

Although they had never done it in the old ship John couldn’t deny her mature beauty. He kissed her again this time he moved his hand under her bra feeling her breasts. It was soft and firm like a medically perfect breast. Chakwas moans as Shepard gets more aggressive. He begins to snake his other hand towards Chakwas pussy he feels her wet panties when the doctor breaks away. “That’s enough for now. But there will be another time commander. I’m not quite ready yet.”

John nods and leaves. Jane joins him as they head to the galaxy map “how was it?”

“Pretty good, I can't believe we never did it in the last normandy. But the last two years have been hard for her.. We have to give her time” John says

Jane nods “ok, but either way the next place we go to better have a brothel”

“Why?” John says.

“Because ignoring what just happened in the med bay we haven't had any real action in two years. Time to get back into the game” Jane declars.

John laughs “let's save the galaxy again!”

###

End chapter.


	4. Bimbo Effect 2: CH 4 Citadel Kasumi and Anderson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Visiting the Citadel after two years things have changed and picking up a new crew mate

Bimbo Effect 2: CH 4 Citadel Kasumi and Anderson

The twins decided their first stop should be the Citadel to gather what support they could. But considering how helpful the council was last time they had to save the galaxy and Cerberus status as a terrorist it was a long shot. But the Citadel was where their old friend Captain Anderson was now the counselor of humanity. And it was also where the illusive man said one of their potential crew mates was meeting them. One Kasumi Goto The Master thief.

Back in the old days they could park their ship right next to the Presidium, the heart of the citadel, but that was back when they were a specter, so now they had to land in Zakera Wards. A ward was more or less a city on the Citadel and like any large city is was crowded and dangerous if you wandered into the wrong parts.

As soon as they docked they saw that the customs area was filled with people, but before they could take it in a holo advertisement flashed with a hooded asian woman that addressed Shepard “Commander Shepard enter the password to receive a free prize.”

The twins stared at the holo projection as the asian woman kept dropping badly worded hints of business and collectors. Finally they decided to address it.”please tell me your password” the holo sas

“Silence is Golden” the twins respond

“Good to finally meet you Comander, Kasumi Goto, I'm a fan.” Kasumi sasy casually

“Have you been briefed on our mission?” Shepard asks

“Honestly I'm surprised Cerberus didn’t try to recruit me earlier, my fault for being so hard to find.” Kasumi says

“Why all the sneaking around are you in trouble?” the twins ask

“I’m the best thief in the business, not the most famous. I have to keep on my toes to keep it that way. Plus I wanted to make sure this was all legit. But i’m convinced not even without knowing what you looked like i knew it was you. You two have a aura of having seen things no one has seen before.” Kasumi says

A bit honored and disterbed the twins ask “how did Cerberus get you?”

“They were looking for me so i went looking for them. They wanted to recruit people for a dangerous mission and had a great signing bonus. Also i needed help with a job so we made a deal” Kasumi sasy

“What deal?” Jane asks

“That's a bit of a story. Short version: I need to retrieve the gray box of my former Partner Kajio Kuda from a man named Donvan Hawk. Kudo was the best hacker I knew before Hawk killed him” Kasumi says with a bit of hurt in her voice. “He found something he wasn't; supposed to, encrypted it in his memories in the grey box. He warned it could spark interstellar war if it got out. And for it he was killed. Those memories are all that's left of him”

The twins nod “ we can help you get it back.”

“Thanks I can fill you in on the details of the heist as it gets closer, but trust me you're going to love it. We should wrap this up. You look silly talking to an advertisement” the holo projector lowered into the ground. The twins looked up to see Kasumi Goto on a catwalk.

The asian woman wore a black stealth suit that was so tight you could see every curve of her body. The front was white that just showed off her ample bosom and a camel toe. While not as large as other women the twins had seen exposed to Intamacy’s radiation she was just the right size to be a sexy cat burglar. Seductive but efficient. Her hips were covered in belts and pouches that held all her thieving equipment. And her head could not be seen clearly because of the dark hood she wore. You could only see from her nose down showing seductive lips with a purple line drawn vertically on her lower lip. Anything above that was shadowed with only shining dark eyes being seen out of it.

“Be down in a second shepard” she starts walking away and disappears with a cloaking device. Less than ten seconds later she appears next to the twins causing them to jump.

They started to move out as they walked towards customs, they passed aliens and human recruits in training. They stop at the desk where a human women is waiting “been a few years since we’ve passed this way security seems to have tighten” shepard says

“Since the geth attack security has improved to lessen the risk of a similar attack. Sorry for the inconvenience.” the lady behind the counter says

The twins and their squad starts to go through security when an alarm goes off “i didn’t touch anything” Kasumi says

The Turian incharge of the scanner hits a few buttons. “Sorry there seems to be a glitch the system says your dead”

“We were reported as missing in action two years ago” John says thinking that was the most diplomatic answer

“Just give me a second what?” the Turina gets a call on his com “do you really think? All right. Go on through and talk to our chief he should be able to get you reinstated in our systems”

The twins pass and see a heman at a desk batting orders at the other C-sec police. As they epoch he looks at his computer “yep i see the problem already computer says your dead commander shepard”

“Arnt you afraid we might be an imposter” Jane says smuggly

“This is the best scanner around, it can read DNA from skin flakes. If it says your shepard your shepard.”

“They ask how to get it fixed and Captain Bailey tells the year long bureaucratic process and suggests just pressing a button and getting it over with. Bailey was the type of captain that knew when to follow the rules and when to let them slide. They got some information from him about how the repairs form sovereigns attack had been going. How Humans had been rising the ranks in c-sec after the major casualties from the geth attack. Adn the major crime rings, Drugs gangs, and apartently illigal sex mods have gotten popular lattly. He suggests they head to the presidium and talk to the counsel and then say their goodbyes.

First thing they noticed was all the sexy aliens walking around next to the normal ones. The difference was like night and day you could have one asari with normal human-like prapations next to another who looked like they had watermelons on their chest. Even the avina help holograms were busty like when Intimacy had hacked them “Looks like the radiation has been leaking a bit” Jane says

“You two have been gone a while” Kasumi says “that stuff is everywhere now, from people purposely exposing themselves to the radiation, to mods based on the radiation, to even drug form. Not sure how they do it but in the past two years it’s almost become normal. I even got hit when I stole an artifact that was soaked with the stuff. A little annoying to get used to but no one sees me anyway so no big deal” Kasumi says with a smirk.

They explore a bit finding stores with sexy kiosk managers, getting discounts. Even finding the supplies that mess sergeant Gardner asked for as well as doctor Chakwas iced brandy. The personal advertisements made funny notes about the fact they had died, even trying to sell them a coffin.

They even saw slipways from their old news friend Emily Wong . The sexy young news reporter was now famous and respected, reporting on Shepard’s mission to Freedom's Progress.

As they explored they ran into a person they rather forget. “Khalisah al-Jilani” the woman introduces herself. The twins remember her from when they went after Saren, she had tried to do a smear report about them. And they were sure she would do so again. The only improvement they could say about her was that she was having trouble fitting in her dress due to the interview she gave them two years ago.

She tries to paint the decision to have the fifth fleet help the counsel during Sovereign attack as a bad thing but the twin interrupt her by naming off all the ships human and non human that was lost that day “every person in the fifth fleet is a hero they deserve better then what the counsel gave them and they deserve better then what your giving them” 

The twins storm off Jilani turns to her camera “Commanders Jane and John Shepard heroes of the Citadel , we get that? Good. i can’t believe it bull rushed on my own show”

“I really wanted to punch her” Jane says

“You can borrow my cloaking device” Kasumi offers

“Oh look something interesting over theory” John says he hears Jilani give a pained grunt and smiles as his twin reapers next to him.

###

Finally they got to the presidium and Captain Anderson's office where he and holograms of the rest of the counse were waiting. “Anderson it's great to see you. How you been?” the twins give their former commanding officer a hug

“There's been some rough patches but i’m getting along” Anderson the human counselor says

The holograms speak up “we have heard of your return Shepard some of the rumors are unsettling” the Salesian counselor says

“We have called this meeting so you could explain yourself shapard”

we owe you that much for saving our lives” the asari councilor says

“ Collectors are abducting human collenist In The terminus systems, words we think they are working for the reapers” John reports

“The terminals systems are out of our jurisdiction your people know this before they left counsel space” the turian counseled says

“Your missing the important point the reapers are involved” Anderson rebukes

“Ah yes reapers” the turian says with air quotes “ the race of immortal starships hiding in dark space we have dismissed that claim”

Anderson turned to Shepard “I believe you but we don’t have any further proof, the vigil is gone and they can’t find anything from sovereigns remains so to them Saren was the leader of that attack”

Shepard tries talking sense into them but they refuse to acknowledge the reapers. They bring up how they are in a difficult spot since Shepard is now part of Cerberus, a direct enemy to the council. Anderson defends the twins so the council makes a compromise. They slow Shepard to become a specter again so long as they keep to the terminus systems.

The twins accept the offer.

“That went better than I thought” Anderson says “you do realize what they said is just symbolic they won’t actually do anything”

“We know “ Jane says “but might as well keep on good terms for when we really need a favor”

“True enough” Anderson says

Using comes i. And argues with Anderson about the politics. But Anderson puts him in his place.

Anderson talks to Shepard. He is stressed but Fighting the good fight. And the twins are glad to have such a friend. “So they refuse to acknowledge sovereign but what about intimacy?” Jane asks

“That's the odd thing. Not long after you disappeared so did any sign of that other reaper.” Andersons says “i still don;t trust it if it really wanted our help it would have revealed itself to the council. But as you can see it’s effets are everywhere. The counsel wants to chalk it up to mads and drugs but this level of change in citizens isn;t normal, but since it doesn't directly involve them they ignore it”

“What about the geth?” John asks

“where still fighting off holdouts of Sovereign's Geth, as for intimacy’s geth everytime we find some of them they simply run away. If we try to talk they ignore us, if we try to arrest any they defend themselves. But from what we can tell they are still in their civil war.” Anderson sasy

“So people are just goig sex crazy and no one cars?” Jane asks

“Heh” Anderson laughs “it’s like they found the fountain of youth the only thing keeping it from being completely legal is that overuse can make people into brainless bimbos. Sex traficing is up witch means like it or not they have to acknolege it. Even if they don’t acknowledge the source.”

“It was good seeing you Anderson sure you won't help us take down the collectors?” the twins ask

“I’m to old for that. Plus as much as i complain i have an important job to do here. I’ll do what I can to help. Or if you ever want to talk i’ll be here” anderson says with a smile. The twins give a hug and leave.

###

On the normandy the crew greats them “i’ll find some quarters then “Kasumi says

“I believe you would like the port Observation Lounge” Edi suggests

“Thanks shiny bubble lady, wonder if i can steal that?” Kasumi says

“Sow how good are you?” Jane asks

“Well besides all the feels i coped i also snagged these” Kasumi says holding up the twins underwear

The twins' eyes widened as they quickly checked and sure enough they were going commando. “She’s good” John says

“Not to bad your self shepard” Kasumi says, going to have to check out the whole ship before i decide who has the best tongue

The twins could tell they had a good new teammate. John was a little nervous to know that she could be anywhere invisible spying on him, but it also excited him a bit. As for Jane, she just wished she had Kasumi’s cloaking field.

###

End chapter.


	5. Bimbo Effect 2: ch 5 Omega Aria

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Twins land on a lawless planet with lawless use of sex drugs

The twins having picked up their first crew member at the citadel were ready to leave “civilized” space and go to war with the collectors.

First stop Omega.

The ancient mining station used to be an asteroid filled with Element 0 or Ezo for short. The precious material was important for mass effect travel and biotics. However once the station had mined the asteroid hollow and the miners moved away it became a hive for gangs and criminals to hide and set up shop.

The normandy approached the station and the twins looked as the whole thing was illuminated with red lights. Metallic spires webbed out of the asteroid. The twins stared at the awesome sight.

“It looks like a mushroom cloud.” John says

“Omega is considered lawless so that observation describes the mentality perfectly” Edi say over the ships speakers

“My kind of place then” Jane says with a smirk

“Gather the squad were going ashore” John orders

“I guess i should put something on then” the invisible voice of Kasumi says

The twins stand in silence a bit. Then double check their clothes and belongings. “Does that mean Kasumi is walking around naked and invisible?” the tins get nosebleeds

###

The squad gets ready to disembark”anyone been to this place before?” the twins ask

“It's a pisshole, I've had to come on business before. I feel like I need a shower afterwards on top of normal decontamination.” Miranda says

“I second that” Jacob says loading his weapon

“Not the classes of people but i've done a few heists here” Miranda says

As soon as they exit a salarian scavenger tries to hustle them until a rough Batarian scars him off “blasted scavenger. Welcome to omega Shepard”

You Know who we are?” the twins say

“Of course we had you pinged the second you entered the terminus system. You're not as subtle as you think. Aria wants to know what brings a dead spector to Omega. I suggest you go to the Afterlife now and present yourself.”

“Cut the attitude were not here to cause trouble” Jane says

“Things explode around you Shepard, can’t Blame Aria for being cautious. Afterlife now” with that the Batarian leaves

“Whoes Aria” John Asks.

“Omega has no law, but Aria is the closest it has to an authority figure. She keeps the gangs in check” Jacob says

“She used the afterlife bar as her throne room” Miranda adds

“Plus she has collected a nice collection of valuables from her long career” Kasumi grins.

Edi speaks on Coms “i'm receiving quarantine warnings around the neighborhood that Dr. Mordin has set up his clinic. I also intercepted information about the gangs organizing to take care of Archangel, there should be recruiting station in the Afterlife with more information. Finally the contract Mercenary Zaeed that Cerberus hired says he will meet you on Omega.”

The squad doesn't have to travel far till they find the mercenary beating on a Batarian. Zaeed was an older human male. His graying hair was combed back. The left side of his face scared and his armor old and modded to fit the grizzled mercenary before them. “You must be sheppard i hear we have a galaxy to Save”

“Wwe assume you’ve been briefed” the twins ask

“I’ve done my homework. Cerberus sent me everything I needed to know.” Zaeed says

“What's your relationship with Cerberus?” shepard asks

“Simple, they're paying me a lot of money to help. That's the long and short” Zaeed says

“Not many mercs would take a suicide mission for thepay”

“Most Mercs don’t get an offer like the ones Cerburus gave me. This mission doesn't sound like good business but your Illusive man can move a lot of credits.”

“What's with the Batarian?”

“This delinquent pissed off someone rich that paid me to go after him. For my bring him in alive rates even. Led me on a chase all over the system. He should have known better, rats always run to Omega. I’m going to turn him in for the bounty then i’m all yours”

“Good to have you aboard Zaeed” the twins shake his hand

“I assume the illusive man told you about our argument” Zaeed says getting the Batarian punk up

“He must have left it out of the dossie” Shepard says

“Glad I asked. I picked up a mission before signing on with Cerberus. Have you heard of Vido Sandiago? He’s the head of the Blue Suns, runs the whole organization. Seems he’s captured a refinery and the owners are paying for me to take it back.” Zaeed says

“Well get it done” Shepard says

“Good we get that out of the way so we can focus on being big godd*** Heroes.” Zaeed says Zealous as the Batarian tries to make a run for it. But Zaeed casually shots the runner in the leg. “Better turn this thing in before it starts to stink. I’ll be locked and loaded next time your Ready to get some killing done.” 

As Zaeed walks off Shepard tells him to meet them at the Afterlife. Doesn't take long to find the huge bar with neon “Afterlife” written on it. The bouncer lets them in. a couple of Batarian thugs tries to threaten them but Jane scares them away.

“I’m surprised you let Jane handle these things John.” Jacob says

“Places like this i find her Bad cop works better than my good cop” John says.

As they enter the main bar they see neon lights. Holographic and real flames. Asri pole dancing. Just glancing around the twins could see at least a dozen crimes. From drug deals to health code violations. But what really got them was the abnormal amount of sexy women. Especially the dancers. Asary bouncing their nacked blue boobies and boobies the size of small planets around polls. John couldn’t help notice the ones with bigger assets getting better tips. Though some looked more interested in the ones giving the tips then the money itself. Asri when’t the only ones. Salarian, human, turina there were attractive people all around the bar. Though they didn’t see any turina women.

The twins had heard Kasumi say the Radiation had been treated like a drug, but looking around this city where all crime was legal they finally understood what she meant.

The pass a drinkers, dancers and passed out stripers till they reach the balcony overlooking the whole bar where a dozen well armed aliens stood guard. “That's close enough” Aria says

As the squad is checked for weapons they get a good look at the Asari Aria. She was beautiful like all Asari but what shocked the twins was that Aria was the only Asari on Omega that wasn’t exposed to the pink radiation at all.

“We hear your the one to ask question to” the twins say

“That depends on the Question” Aria turns to face them. She wears an open white high collar jacket. Underneath. Her clothes are a series of black pants and corset made from belts and buckles that left gaps to expose her sensual blue skin; her distugusiong marks were a black chinn strip tattoo as well as two upper half--circles that connected where her eyebrows would be.

“You run Omega” Jane asks

Aria laughs and holds out her arms “i am Omega. But everyone needs more and they all come to me. I’m the boss, the CEO, they queen if you're feeling dramatic. But Omega has no tidal ruler and only one rule Don’t F*** with Aria.”

“Easy to remember i like it” Jane says with a smirk”

“If you forget someone will soon remind you” Aria says then motions for the twins to sit “so what can i do for you?”

“So you know what on omega?”

“Everything worth knowing. I usually don[t give it out freely. Mundane things are easy to find out for yourself. Just walk down a back alley, or buy a merc a drink. Or better yet talk to the entertainers they give great tours. Especially now. Just don’t waste my time

“How did you get set up here?”

“That's privileged information. We’ll see how useful you are then maybe one day. For now. Mind your own **** business”

“We're looking for Mordin Solus, know where to find him?”

“The salarion Dr.? last i heard he was helping Plague victims in the quarantine Zone. i always liked Mordin he was as likely to shoot you as heal you.”

“What can you tell us about him?”

“He neer shuts up! But brilliant ex military. If you really want to find him take a shuttle to the quarantine Zone. no guarantee they will let you in though.”

“Where also trying to find Arch angle”

“You and half of Omega!”

“Why is he so popular?”

“He thinks he fights for the side of good. But there is no good side to Omega. Everything he does Pisses someone off. It’s catching up to him”

:sounds just like the guy were looking for”

“Arn;t you interesting. You're going to make enemies that way. Assuming you get to him. He’s in trouble right now. The local merc gangs have joined forces to kill him. They have him cornered but are having trouble finishing him off. They're hiring anyone with a gun to help. Recruiting station is just down theri i’m sure they will let you sign up.”

“What can you tell us about archangel?”

“Nt much as I like. He showed up a few months ago. He’s turian he’r handsome for his species. He’s idealistic if you make your own law which everyone here does he makes life difficult. But he leaves me alone, the blue suns, eclips, and blood pack gangs all fight and try to kill him and I'm happy just to watch them kill each other.”

“Thanks”

“Let's see how thankful you are when the mercs release your their to help him.” Aria smirks

“One last thing, the bimbo radiation, drug, whatever you want to call it how do you get it.?” John asks

Aria skowls,” that stuff is everywhere showed up about a year ago. First as an aphrodisiac then as a physical stimulant. I don’t know where they make it but you can find drug form of it at any ally drug dealer and even most stores around here. People think it gives them an edge.”

“Why haven;t you taken it?” Jane say cockly

Aria stands up “there are many vices i enjoy. But that pink stuff isn't one of them. People try to use it as a cheat. Dancers to get more tips, mercs to get stronger. And dealers to give them better chances with the opposite sex. Me? I worked for centuries to Become omega. I don;t need to cheat, and i don’t need some drug to get what i want”

“With that body i can see why you don’t need it” John says both squad member and Aria goon groan and roll there eyes at that

Aria doesn't even smile “i know your reputation shepard and I do my homework, you call it radiation, so why pay and become addicted to something i can get for free with time. As for you shepherd, you are neither enemy nor friend. I’m curious but ultimately Omega doesn't care about you. Keep working and maybe you’ll become something i care care about”

With that Aria shoos them away. “Ouch denied” Jane says

“Something about confident, hard to get women that is so attractive” John says “but she's a poison fruit not sure if i want that.”

“Think she’ll change?” Jane asks

“With the amount of radiation in this place only a matter of time” John says, then spies Zaeed coming towards them “so what do you think of the new recruit?”

Jane smiles “not my usual type. But a person with that much experience? Can’t help but admire that.”

The squad all gathered the twins take their assessment. “Looks like we have one man concerned by killers and the other locked in quarantine, we'll have to move fast to get them before someone else does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wanted to do all the omega missions, but it was to long and I ran out of time but still wanted to post something before the weekend. 
> 
> So here is a poll for the next omega mission.  
> https://www.strawpoll.me/42572208


	6. Bimbo Effect 2: Ch 6 Omega Dr. Mordin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Shepard twins face a plague and get a Dr. Mordin Solis as a crew mate

The Twins Left Aria to focus on finding crew mates “where to next Shepard?” Miranda asks

“Quarantine zone we need to find Dr. Solus” the twins say

“Great it’s my first day on the job and you want me to get killed by a god dahm bug” Zaeed complains in his gruff voice.

“The plague doesn't affect humans according to the reports.” Miranda says in a know it all matter

“Still walking into quarantine. Not many would do that.” Kasumi says

While trying to find their way to the quarantine zone they find a group of Vorcha hanging out in an alley. Vorcha were a primitive but highly adaptable race that loved to fight and lived in the most inhospitable parts of stations like this. They tended to be a little shorter than humans. Their legs bent the opposite of a human. Their faces usually had red eyes, fleshy spikes and razor sharp teeth. The group leader looks at the twin and says “you! Tell Captain Gavorn we no kill anyone today, we know his tricks” then stomps off

“What was that about?” the Twins ask

“Vorcha are mangy blighters” Zaeed says “like wild dogs you either break them to hunt for you like the blood pack gang does or they go wild biting whatever they can till someone puts them out of their misery. i've hunted a lot of them during my time”

The twins nod and find this Captain Gavorn. A Turian standing guard near the Afterlife. “Captain Gavorn of the Vorcha task unit, what can i do for you?” he introduces himself

“There are a lot of vorcha on Omega. What are they planning?” the twins ask

“Vorcha… plan? Hahaha if Vorcha could plan we would all be in trouble. Their a pestilence nothing more.” gavorn dismissed”

“Then what do you do then?” Shepard asks not happy at being brushed off

“Keep the Vorcha in line, Keep them out of Aria’s sight, that's about it. Let me know if you have anything else to report.” Gavron then walks away

“For someone that exterminates Vorcha he doesn't know much about them” Jane complains

“It’s not right to be so lax of your own duty.” Jacob complains.

“I hear that handsome” Jane says Jacob doesn't respond but he did get a little hot to the face.

The squad finally make it to the entrance of the Quarantine zone where a Turian guard is keeping a human woman out “complaining is useless human theirs a plague no one goes in or out”

“You can’t keep me out i live in their” the woman complains

“Look i’m doing you a favore if i let you in the guards would cut you down” the turian defends

“You can’t do this everything i own is in that apartment” she complains

“I told you get lost” the guard says losing his temper plague means no one gets in or out!”

“I’m human you jerk we can’t get the plague. Now let me get my stuff before looters do” the woman complains

“This thing affects every other race, we aren't taking any chances till the plague runs its course” the guard counters.

“I didn’t think there was any law enforcement on Omega” Shepard says

“Aria gave the order to close it up, bad for business” the Turian says

“Were looking for Mordin Solus he’s living their” Shepard says

“That crazy doctor? Yeah he opened a clinic a few months back. The blue suns were not happy about that. I hear he’s trying to cure the plague. I wish him luck. Till then our orders are to wait till the plague or the blue suns kill everyone then go clean up” the turian reports

“What's this plague do anyway” Shpard askas

“Starts as a cough then you start coughing blood. And it infects everyone except humans. And Vocha i guess if you count them.” the guard says

“Sounds nasty can’t let that get out” Shepard says

“You said it. People figure it must be synthetic since a disease like this shouldn’t affect so many species. And since humans are immune and doing a lot of looting a lot of species are blaming them” the guard says

“Well we are here to help get rid of it. Aria gave us a go ahead to get in” Shepard says

“Really? Well the quarantine is more to keep infected people in, so enter at your own risk. I’ll radio ahead and let the guards know your coming.” the guard says

“Wait, you're letting them in but not me?! Jerk!” the woman says

“You don’t have a grenade launcher so get lost” the guards says

Were all human so the plague won’t affect us, so let's do this” Kasumi says

“Good thing we haven't picked up any alien crew members yet” Shepherd says

###

They enter the quarantine zone. The guards let them through and wish them luck. They see dead everywhere in piles burning.

“Oh my god” Jacob says disterbed by the infected scene

“Burning corpses they must be trying to keep the plague from spreading” miranda observes

“I’ve seen bad, this is worst” Kasume says turning invisible as if to hide from the scene

“This is a enemy that you can’t fight against” Zaeed says like a hardened vetreran

The twins lead the squad forward taking out blue suns mercenaries that were shooting anything that moves. Eventually they find a Batarian civilian still alive but barely.

“Humans of course *cough* it's bad enough you brought this plague *cough* but now you don’t even wait for me to die to take my positions and have the Vorcha eat my flesh” the batarian says feverishly

“Here let me help” John says, trying to give first aid but the batarian instead threatens him with a gun. John backs off but tries to talk to him “were looking for Mordin Solus”

“Figures *cough* human looking for a human sympathizer *cough* I hope the blues suns burn his clinic to the ground. *cough* curse you *cough *curse you….”

“Woah hold on stay with us, Jane hand me some medigel” John says and his sister roughly hands over a med pack. “This won’t cure the plague but it should help” John says giving emergency first aid

The Batarian is well enough to get to his feet “you helped me but why?”

“It’s what we do” John says

“The red haired woman doesn't seem to think so” the batarians says exhaustedly

“Batarians attacked my home, takes me a long time to warm up to your kind” Jane says cooly

“Heh we are your enemy but you still give us aid… might be the fever but what do i have to lose, what do you want to know human?” the batarian says

“Where can we find Mordin Solus?” Shepard asks

“He has a clinic on the far side of the district. He’s taking in refugees offering to help with the plague. I was afraid to go to him before” the batarian says

“what's so bad about him that you rather risk the plague?”

“Blue suns tried to press him for protection money so he killed them. Hit them with some toxin then gunned them down. He’s not a normal doctor. A normal doctor doesn't kill people then display their corpses as a warning.” the batarian says

The twins look at each other worriedly “what were you saying about the vorcha?”

“The blue suns ruled this district but as the plague spread their numbers fell now the Vorcha are unchecked and taking everything”

“Maybe they created the Plague” John offers

“No their not smart enough, and even if they were, why would they make humans immune when Vorcha are already immune to disease? Sorry humans but logic points to your species” the baterian says

“Thanks for your help” John says

As the squad moves out Jane pauses and takes a deep breath “if Dr. Solus has found a cure we’ll try to get it to you”

The Batarian looks at her with surprise “thank you”

As they move out Jacob moves up to Jane “given your history i’m surprised Shepherd”

“If i left him to die i would be just as bad as them. Besides if i’m to bad a a-hole my brother will probably try to sign me up for therapy again” Jane says

“Well way to be the bigger person” Jacob says

The squad heads deeper into the district fighting blue suns. And finding the sad remains of those that didn’t survive this crisis either by the plague or the blue suns.

They open one apartment and find a middle aged human couple. Despite their age the twins could tell they had been hit by Intamacy’s bimbo radiation. The woman almost looked like an older Jane barely able to fit into her dress, and the husband looked strong enough to fight an ox. they had been hiding from the blue suns and the non humans that had become paranoid since humans were not getting sick. They believed it had to be the Vorcha that made the plague since they were taking over the Blue’ sun’s territory.

“So humans are completely immune?” shepard asks

“Yeah but it wasn't after the plague that we noticed some changes” the wife says trying to hide her cleavage

“But at least it kept us distracted from fearing for our lives” the husband says

The twins noticed all the discarded underwear over the apartment and realized the couple had nothing to do but shag since being in quarantine. 

“Were going to be under heavy fire from both the vorcha and the blue suns, but we promise to make a safe trail for you to get to Dr. mordin’s clinic” the twins promise

The couple was still nervous given Dr. Solus’s reputation for killing blue suns, but it was still safer than waiting to be killed by gang members so they agreed to follow once the path was safe.

They move on and see vorcha attacking blue suns. The squad moves in and takes both sides out.

“Being beat on by vorch these boys are pathetic” Zaeed says

“To think the vorcha pushed the Blue suns this far back” Kasumi says

“They might be close to ending this war” Miranda says

The squad moves on and finds human looters stealing from dead plague victims. The twins tell them to scram but the looters point out that the plague actually enhanced humans and made them tougher. The twin then point out that muscles don’t make you bulletproof. The looters scram.

They finally reach the clinic guards keeping an eye out for refugees and enemies.

The doctors are busy working to talk and the patients are just happy to be safe and alive. Finally they see Dr. Solus. He’s an old salarion wearing a white doctors uniform, his head crests were lopsided and she spoke at a million MPH.

“Dr. Mordin Solus?” the twins ask

The dr does a quick scan “Hm-don’t-reconize-you-new-to-district-no-not-reffugee-to-well-armed-quarintine-still-in-effect-vorcha?-mercinary-crew-here-to-take-them-out?-no-no-vorcha-are-symptom-not-cause-the-plauge?-reserch-as-bio-weapon-no-too-many-gun-not-enough-scince-equiptment-soilder-not-scientist-yes-yes-looking-for-something?”

At this point jane is ready to tear her hair out but John keeps her from lashing out and steps in “relax Dr. i’m commander shepard we need you for a critical missions”

“Missions?-what-mission-” the Dr says “no-no-no-clinic-understaffed-plauge-spreading-to-quickly-am-needed-here-who-sent-you?”

“I can barely understand you” Jane says

“Sorry...i...will...try...to..slow...down no-to-much-happening-who-sent-you” Dr solus says

“Ever heard of a group called cerberus” shepard asks

Dr Solus frowns “have-crossed-paths-on-occasion i-thought-they-only-worked-with-humans why-seek-salarian-aid?”

“Collectors are kidnaping entire human populations,we are going to figure out why and stop them” shepard says

“Colletors-intresting-plauge-hitting-slums-is-by-desighn-collectors-are-one-of-few-groups-with-technology-able-to engineer-it-our-goals-may-be-alighned -but-need-to-stop-plauge-first-already-have-cure-need-to-distribute-it-at-envirenmental-control-being-guarded-by-vorcha-need-to-kill-them”

“We’ll handle the vorcha” Jane says just as all the lights turn off with a slow groan

“That sounds troubling” Miranda says

“Vorcha-shut-down-enviromental-station-trying-to-suffecate-everyone-need-to-turn-back-on her-is-cure-plus-bonus-took-weapon-from-dead-bluesuns-merc one-more-thing-assistant-Daniel-went-out-looking-for-plauge-victioms-hasn’t-returned.” the dr says piling equipment onto the twins.

“If we see him we’ll help” shepard says

“Thank-you-told-him-not-to-go-smart-bright-future-i-hope” Dr solus says

“We met a sick batarian. Can you send someone to help?” shepard ask  
“Risky-see-what-i-can-do” Mordin says

“Any trouble setting up here” the twins ask

“Blue-suns-try-to-threaton-me-took-them-out” Mordin says calmly

“Not everyone could be so calm about taking out gang members

“Not-always-dr-part-of-salarian-special-tasks-group-have training” Mordins says taking out his gun “advantage-turian-krogan-batarian-all-obvious-threats-they-never-see-me-coming.”

“What do you know about the vorcha?” shepard asks

“Opertunistic-scavangers-suspect-they-work-for-collectors-spread-virus--collect-data-no-proof-but-therory-fits-evedence, Susspected-collectors-before-you-brought-them-up-virus-near-perfect-cause-genetic-mutations-make-sence-to-not-target-human-for-sake-of-variance”

“What do you mean” shepard asks

“Possible-goal-of-virous-to-see-genetict-mutations-amoung-specious-human-have-wider-range-of-genetics-compared-to-most-sapiant-races

“Why are humans getting stronger?”

Mordin looked perplexed “Unknown-slight-flaw-with-plague-attempted-modification-after-collectors-gave-it-to-vorcha/”

“Not sure i understood, but we will stop them” Shepard says

“Thank-you-can’t-leave-clinic-to-busy” Mordin says turning back to his patients

###

It didn’t take the squad long at all to find vorcha. They fight through the packs of vorcha as they laugh maniacally at the squad. Eventually they find Dr. Solus assistant Daniel being held at gunpoint by batarian thugs who thought he was spreading the virus.

The twins manage to talk sense into the batarians. The inlogic of taking a virus to Vorcha Territory. Telling them if they let Daniel go they would be let go. They agree.

“We did what you said. Can we go human?” the batiran leader says

“Deals a deal get out of here” John says

“Human nobility, didn’t know there was such a thing” the batarian says

“I could say the same for batarians” Jane says reluctantly putting away her gun.

They calm Daniel down and send him back to Mordin.

They eventually find the environmental controls when a larch vorcha tries to stop them “you no be here, we break fans, everyone choke, collectors make us strong then”

“What do the collectors want” Shepard demands

“Collector want plage. You work for doctor, put cure in air, you die now gah!” the Vorcha leader yells as his hudge pack is about to attack. 

A new voice yells similar to a vorcha but higher and slightly softer “collectors work for bad machine, they no keep deal. Good machine make good for everyone”

Boths sides look as a new group enters from a different door. This group appears to be made up of what the twins can only assume is female Vorcha. While male vorcha looked hard and spiky the females looked smoother. They were completely covered in soft muscle like a swimmers body with all the fat worked off. Their breasts and butt were small for someone exposed to the bimbo effect but prominite. Their nails looked more like manicured sharp nails as opposed to the males claws. And while the men work loincloths and belts to hold their weapons. The woman had only one belt around there waist to hold their weapons and a fanny pack to hold their belongins which the shepherds could see were mostly sex toys.

“Dumb cows help doctors sevants kil them all” the vorcha male leader yells.

It turns into complete pandemonium “are the lady vorcha on our side? Jacob asks

Just then a female vorcha hops next to Jacob and licks her lips “handsome man help cure? Good!” And goes back to fighting

“I guess so” Shepard says

Despite the male vorcha’s numbers the females make it much easier to beat them and repair the machine.

“Glad that’s over let’s return to dr mordin” Miranda says

“Not yet,” Shepard says heading to the leader of the female vorcha “can you answer our questions?”

“For handsome man yes” the lady vorcha says

“Why did the Vorcha start the plague” Shepard asks

“Don’t know. Lady Vorcha get no respect, treated like mates for strongest male.vorcha treated as stupid, as weak. as trash. Collectors talk to clan leaders say make strong if we make omega sick. Men say yes they no care what lady think. Then big boob lady machine come. She taught us lady can be stronger and prettier. Change us to pretty and nicer.”

“Big boobed machine” Kasume asks

“Must have been one of Intamacy’s geth” Shepard says “trying to get the Vorcha to join their side before they could join the Reapers”

“Yes Intimacy they say that name” lady vorcha says “we become strong and pretty but many packs no like that so we make new pack. Take obedient male to make strong pack. And have fun hunting handsome men.”

Seeing some concerned looks Lady vorcha clarifies “We no kill we release. Bad vorcha release plague, we try fix but we don’t know how.”

“They must have contaminated the plague that would explain while the humans become bimbos” Miranda says

“Bad vorcha break fans. Would choke handsome men, we had to fix, we meet you, and help you” lady Vorcha says

“So you won’t cause any trouble?” Shepard asks

“Bah, Vorcha need change, we make Vorcha pretty then it be easy to get all handsome men.” Lady Vorcha then looks at the men’s crotches and smiles showing off her razor sharp teeth “handsome men want to lay with pretty vorcha?”

John, and Jacob cover their dicks and look away awkwardly. Zaeed looks at the female vorcha and says “you gotta be outta your goddamn mind”

###

They return to the clinic where Mordin is doing calculations “environmental-system-online-cure-dispence-airborn-virus-levels-decreaasing-patiants-improving-thank-you”

“And thank you for saving me from the batarians” Daniel says “for a second i thought you were going to shoot them anyway

“I thought about it” Jane says

“But we keep our promises” John finishes

“Noble-risky-would-have-killed-them-myself” Mordin says

Danile looks disgusted “Mordin you're a doctor you believe in helping people!”

“Many-ways-to-help-people-sometimes-cure-peope-sometimes-execute-dangerous-people-either-way-helps-go-help-the-patients-think-aboutwhat-i-said Mordian shoo’s off Daniel

Mordin then looks to the twins “good-kid-naive-he’ll-learn-will-have-him-take-over-theclinic-should-be-able-to-handle-it-now-that-enimy-vorcha-are-gone-must-say-suprised-to-hear-female-vorcha-are-helpin-they-rarly-leave-home.”

“Are you ready to help us to stop the collectors?” shepard asks

“Yes-did-not-expect-to-help-cerberous-many-suprises-need-to-finish-thing-sher-will-meet-you-at-your-ship” Mordin says “looking-forward-to-it”

The twins began to leave but not before seeing the batarian and the couple they helped both looking much better. Looking around they could see many of the pationst looking much better and already being bimboed from the female Vorcha’s tampering.

“Looks like the Lady Vorcha are going to have a lot of handsome men to hunt” Jane Jokes

###

As they head to the Normandy they run into Captain Gavorn again “are you responsible for the decrease of Vorcha?” he asks

“Yes” the twins admit

“Well thanks for making my job easier, but with how fast they breed their numbers will be up again in no time” Gavorn says

Jane marches up to his face “you need to take your job more seriously. You had no idea that the Vorcha were behind the plague”

“Wha?” Gavorn says

“Not to mention their are female Vorcha making a power play” John finishes

“Female vorcha you can’t be serious-” Gavorn begins when a voice interrupts him

“Gavorn we need to make deal” a female Vorcha marches up to Gavorn. Bystanders stop and gawk, having never seen an attractive Vorcha. As the female makes demands Gavorn just sputters in shock.

The twins leave the captain laughing at Gavorn’s new found responsibilities.

###

On board the normandy Jacob welcomes Mordin. Edi then gives Mordin the location of the medbay and Mordin correctly deduces that Edi is a A.I. 

They catch Mordin up on the Mission. He relishes tha Cerberus is desperate but agrees to help. 

The twins meet him In his lab. He explains he destroyed the surveillance bugs and returned the really expensive ones to Miranda. The twins ask about his military experience and he explains he is ex salarian special forces the STG. Retired but still skilled and still hears things that are normally supposed to be secret.

As they talk they find out more about the STG and the Genophage that infect the Krogans. Mordian had many missions but his main ones were focused on recon of what would happen if the genophage wore off.

They Found out they both worked with Captain Kirriahe. Mordin served under him and the twins helped hime destroy Saren’s base. Both agreed he was a good man but a bit of a cloaca

Mordin loved the challenge of helping people in hard circumstances. Eventually the twins asked for his opinion about the bimbo effect spreading

“almost-completly-illogical-fasinating-both-helpul-and-deleberating-case-by-case-scenario-if-willing-would-love-to-study-you-being-patiant-zero-and-all-if-not-to-invasive.” mordian says

“So long as you don’t dissect us it should be fine. You should compare notes with Dr. Chakwas. She has been studying this since we got it.” Shepard says “but for now gear up we have another mission”

“Oh-what-is-that?” Mordains asks courteously

“Your not the only one we needed to get from Omega, we need to rescue Archangel” Shepard says

###

To be continued.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did something special for Mordins face pace talk, but for ease of writing I’ll not do that again


End file.
